Thursday, April 26, 2007


I could eat cereal for every meal for the rest of my life. Of course, that would shorten my life-span considerably, but you get the idea. Any kind of cereal for the most part, will fit the bill. A list of some of my favorites:

- Froot Loops
- Crispix
- Shreddies (they make me feel super Canadian, for some reason)
- Just Right
- Mini Wheats
- Corn Pops
- Honey Nut Corn Flakes, now called Honey Crunch Corn Flakes

When I was little and eating Mini Wheats, I would pretend they were all contestants in a beauty contest and I was the judge. They were mainly judged on two criterion: if they were complete, with no small chunks missing, and if the frosted side was as smooth and covered as possible. The one I deemed the most beautiful, I ate last.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007


Will made me a certificate to certify that I am "cuter than anyone ever". Signed by him, the one and only member of the Cuteness Committee. How fucking adorable. I'ma going to go kiss 'im.

Monday, April 23, 2007


I am new to the world of taking my digital camera memory cards to London Drugs and asking them to print copies of my digital photos. Having only seen my photos on my laptop, I was unaware of holy truly righteous they were. I also got some two-dollar clip frames and have begun putting them around my place. Now I have photos AND silly paintings I've done on my walls! It's a pretty sweet life.

My Chewbacca "rapture" photo is one of my absolute favorites and is my picture for this blog. It is now hanging up in real life over my sink to inspire me while I do dishes.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

My tongue went black this morning after I swished out my mouth with my new mouthwash. Mouthwash is fun! I thoroughly enjoy the weird dry, burny feeling. It feels like a million bacteria are dying at once. My tongue went black from the Pepto Bismol pills I took last night after eating too much candy while playing video games. I looked it up online. If it wasn't for the internet, that would have been a silly visit to the walk-in clinic!

A recap of things I liked that I discussed:

1. Killing bacteria via mouthwash
2. Black tongue
3. Eating candy while playing video games
4. The internet

Thursday, April 19, 2007


Will and I bought a Wii today and I could pee my pants in excitement! His old room-mate had one and it was sooo dang fun. I'm planning on having a thousand Wii hangouts involving junk food, beer and Wii.

We checked around a bunch of stores yesterday, and no dice. Some places practically laughed at us. So I made a "places to harass" list of phone numbers to call every day until I got one. And it worked like a charm! The second one on my list, the HMV in Mayfair said they had four. I asked if they would hold one for me? No. Even if I gave my credit card number? No. Would they have any left in an hour? Maybe. So, we ran out the door, caught the bus, quietly cursed everyone who got on or off the bus, including the pokiest bus driver in all eternity. I even called him a "cock-smoker" under my breath. We ran through the parking lot, quick-walked our way through teenagers and got to HMV out of breath. They had one left. We had gotten there in forty minutes and they had one left. WOOHOOO!

We had a celebratory lunch of New York Fries hotdogs and french fries. It was an excellent day.

Will Ferrell

Just got back from "Blades of Glory" and oh my was it stupidly hilarious. I giggled and snorted and rolled my eyes at all the ridiculousness and testicle jokes. It was an amusing hour and a half that I'll surely forget I ever saw in a year or two, but until that time...

"The guy who invented rope is an A-HOLE!"

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Red Dwarf

Growing up, on Sunday afternoons with nothing to watch on TV, I'd idly flick the channels and always seemed to come across this show about British people in space. I had a burning curiosity as to why one of them had an "H" on his forehead so I'd stick around for a bit, hoping it would come up. I could never understand what anyone was saying, so I'd give up, annoyed and un-entertained.

Then I guess my ears developed or something, and it was the time of year for the PBS "Red Dwarf" marathon, as I then realized it was called, and I fell in love with it. I figured out that Rimmer was dead and a total smeg-head and that I had this burning need to watch all of them one after another for an entire weekend. The next year I waited in anticipation, blank VHS tapes at the ready, and a chocolate bunny and some peanut butter by my side (the marathons were always around Easter it seems).

Now Will and I are borrowing the DVD collection from our local rental place and burning them, woohoo! Soon I will have all my Red Dwarf at my side again and NOT on disintegrating VCR tapes! It's dang exciting.


I've been collecting quotations since I was the mediator-speller at a spelling bee at Sangster Elementary school when I was in Gr. 7. I sat on the side with this massive, massive dictionary and I would be the deciding rule if there were any disagreements about spellings. Needless to say, these disagreements were few and far between, so I began to peruse this massive tome, only to find that there was a collection of quotations at the end. Part Webster's, part Bartlett's? I have no idea. But that's when I started to become fascinated with quotations.

By Gr. 10 I bought a note book to write them all down in. I now have three notebooks, all with Van Gogh's "Sunflowers" on the front, in slightly different designs. A few years ago I decided to type them all out as well into a Word document. It's about 150 pages long. I also created an alphabetical version of the quotes. I guess this makes me a humongous dork, but whatevs. I like me the quotes, and sometimes they were what I needed to get through some crappy times. Goethe was one of my favorites as a kid, and I had to be corrected by my mom that it wasn't "Go-eth" but "Gout-uh". I'd spell it out with the correct IPA but damned if I can remember the IPA anymore.

Life's a jest and all things show it,
I thought so once, and now I know it.
- epitaph of John Gay

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Baseball Shirts

I bought myself a couple of 3/4 sleeve baseball shirts - orange and blue. Holy fuck am I loving them. So damn comfy. They're bright, shiny colours and aren't just plain ol' boring ol' t-shirts. They've got weird sleeves! They've got a slightly interesting cut! Woohoo to that!

I'm a lazy dresser by nature, I admit. I've been trying to figure out ways to dress slightly more interesting without making it a chore. Thank you, baseball shirts for making it that much easier.

P.S. The juxtaposition of my enormous ta-tas in a boyish shirt is also quite enjoyable.

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Back to Thing I Like

Days at work that go buy hella-fast. I'm usually the kind of worker who stares at clocks and figures out all kinds of fractions and what not of what I have left. Like, I have 2 hours and 15 minutes, so that's 9 fifteen-minute segments, blah blah.... But today was ridiculously fast and painless. It always helps when friends stop by that you haven't seen in forever, your boy brings you a sammich, and you get to play your gameboy. So that's what I did. It was pretty sweet.

Friday, April 13, 2007

Things I Hate

It's going to be about things I hate around here for a while. Just in that kind of mood.

I fucking hate housework. It's a never-ending abyss of exhaustion and ennui. You do the dishes, you make yourself a sandwich and you've also made yourself some more fucking dishes.

How can I have so much laundry for someone who has almost nothing ever to wear? I mean, hell, if I'm going to have to do so much fucking laundry, I might as well have nice things to wash - but it's all just blah t-shirts and sweaters with some grey or brown fucking pants. Garhg.

Papers. Papers fuck on my floor to make new papers - these baby papers, these little tiny scraps of grocery lists and whatnot are too big to vacuum up but too fucking annoying to pick up by hand, which is what I end up doing anyway since I want the infestation to stop. Paper is more fertile than mice, people.

I think that's enough for now.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Kurt Vonnegut

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK. I can't believe I have fucking things to do today.

"Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops."

- Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse Five

I started reading Kurt Vonnegut when I was seventeen and I don't think I'll ever stop.

Shit, I should just be glad he didn't succeed in killing himself in 1984 when he attempted to.
God, I'm bad at keeping this updated. Um, I like the way books smell. Yeah. They smell good. Rock on, books.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007


We're making a motherfuckin' turkey dinner, MUTHAFUCKAHS! TUUUURRRRRRRKEEEEEY!

Monday, April 09, 2007

The world of Mario is amazingly happy. There's so many shiny, happy colours, stars, mushrooms, little games of running around and getting stuff. I love Mario Kart and Mario Party so much it's kind of ridiculous. Playing a mini-game of seeing who can dust furniture the fastest? Yes please. Running around in a little vehicle on a cupcake collecting stars? I'll take two, thank you.

There's no violence or anger - there's just little dudes running around collecting points and things. Sometimes you get bonked on the head and a little circle of stars dances around. If that's the worst thing to happen to you in a day, that's pretty fucking awesome.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

I like briefly-warm things. As a kid I loved jumping into the warm piles of laundry on my mom and dad's bed. My mom got mad at me every single time and to this day I have NO idea why. What the hell is so wrong with enjoying the fleeting heat of the warm clothes? Now that I do all of my own laundry, I still like to sit on my bed, pile the clothes up around and over me while I fold them. If I'm having a shitty day, I'll take the towels, lie down and use them as blankets. So warm and cuddly.

Whenever I was in school and had to get massive amounts of photocopy done, I would hold the finished sheets close to me and suck up the heat and that inky smell through my chest and inner arms. Like a hot bath, once they were cold the laundry and the photocopies meant almost nothing to me - they were placed back on the shelf of just regular things - but for those few fleeting heat-moments they had the ability to make me stop, relax, and think about nothing but how good it felt to be warm.

Friday, April 06, 2007


I've been making lists since I could write. Some of my first journal entries, when I was about seven, are lists of bands I liked (I liked Wham better than Duran Duran, fyi) and rating my friends with certain symbols. Now I make lists of things to do, to buy, to fix on my website, of adventures to attempt. The most important and useful lists I make now are daily, general to-do lists. Yesterday I forgot to do that. Yesterday I forgot to write in this blog. Not a coincidence, folks.

I've always thought that writing lists helps free up your brain from having to try to remember things - write it down and you can think about yams, or hydrofoils, or the nature of beauty. And I think I thought about all those things yesterday, and completely forgot to write in here, because I usually, truly, honestly write it down. It looks something like this:

- phone work
- dishes
- laundry
- return library books
- update fun blog

So, from now on, I'll make sure to write it down so I won't forget to remember that there are beautiful things in the world.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Six Feet Under

I just bought the entire Six Feet Under Series. We bought hot dogs for dinner tonight, and a shrimp ring for tomorrow so we dont' have to cook anything that takes more than heating in a pot. I will be a S.F.U. zombie for the next week. Hurrah! And oh, how I will cry.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Standing Up For Myself

I consider myself a bit of a pushover, I admit. I like making people happy and I like making people like me. It makes me feel better, even if part of me feels like shit for letting them bend me over backwards without so much as a warm-up spank.

And I'm getting too damn old to be such a fucking contortionist. So I said fuck that, and I'm trying to stop it. Working with the police in my sexual assault volunteering, I'm not letting them give us shit. I'm standing up for the survivor and making sure she doesn't feel like a criminal, when in fact they're supposed to be working FOR us and doing what WE want. I did that last Sunday night, told the cops how long they could stay and chat, and that no, they would not be seeing her after her forensic exam, but the next afternoon after she could finally get some sleep. They didn't like me, but they did what I asked and that's what matters.

I've also started to stand up a bit more to the boss of the store I work at. I'm officially refusing to say "my boss". YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME. Exactly.

And please note I'm not talking about being a rude bitch here - I'm talking about not letting people be disrespectful because they think they can get away with it with me since they have in the past. Mrs. Potato Head wouldn't stand for it, so neither will I.

Monday, April 02, 2007

James Kochalka

Good ol' James Kochalka. He draws himself and his wife like elves, but his son like a human, and his friends like monsters or animals.

He's been doing daily comic strips for a thousand years or so, and they're really great. If you read just one of them you sort of go, "meh, it was cute, whatever". It's the whole work of them together that's amazing. His website's archives are only available to those who subscribe, so I buy the books instead. And they're so good, so very very good. If you know of any comic who does daily strips, I can (for the most part) assure you they got the idea from James.

I read James Kochalka when I feel like shit for being a human being. I start to feel good again, and that my imperfections and the imperfect world around me are more beautiful for being so. James works better than Vodka or therapy for me. He will always have a place in my heart and on my bookshelves and if I believed in God, I'd put in a good word to him about good ol' Mr. Kochalka.

Chocolate and Peanut Butter

Holy FUCK do I love a chocolate Easter Bunny with peanut butter smeared all over it. You can get super cheap-ass chocolate, some smooth peanut butter and you're in for a gorging good-time. It's best if you watch a lot of Red Dwarf while doing it. I don't know why, but it just makes it better. Sadly I don't have any Red Dwarf. I'll carry on, somehow....